My #1 Passenger...

Being with Brandy in the same city has been wonderfully awesome. And now that she’s here there’s so much we enjoy doing together. We love going out to eat, catching a movie, and shopping at the mall... We venture out and about with friends, travel to Chicago quite often, and ride downtown to work together on a daily basis. As you see, we drive A LOT.

It didn’t take long for me to pick up on B’s habits while I’m driving. If I’m at a stop sign looking left, then right, and then left again, B is right alongside me doing the same. If I’m at a median intersection waiting for an opening between cars, B is next to me looking for the right opportunity to enter as well. Point is, I quickly noticed that B is a side-seat driver.

My first stubborn Leo-like thought was, Why is she looking too? I’ve had my license over twenty years and never had an accident-I got this. So of course me being me, I called her out on it. B’s response was obvious and expected; she was only double checking to make sure I “had it.” Me: I got it. Since then B has attempted to minimize her passenger seat driving ways, but every now and then I catch her in my peripheral when she must think I can’t see. It makes me smile inside.

See, I finally understand the greater meaning behind B’s actions. She’s not trying to take the wheel and drive for me, she’s simply my look-out. My support.  She checks my blind spot if or when I fail to see. I say this literally and metaphorically. In my everyday movements she’s always there, allowing me to travel the road that only I can, while she silently meets me at every turn, intersection and sometimes road block. She speaks up if there’s oncoming danger I don’t see. And if it’s too late, she’s my seatbelt keeping me safe from harm. If I happen upon an unexpected dead end, she helps me map out an alternate route to ensure I reach my destination. She’s my side view mirror, air bag and GPS all wrapped in one, there for my assistance, protection and guidance as needed.

I no longer cringe when I feel B peeping traffic with me while I drive. It’s a constant reminder that as I journey my life’s roads around mountains, through valleys, and along smooth stretches of highway, I have a partner buckled in at my side, taking in the view right with me. J

© Nikki Rashan, July 2011

Prepared: She is READY

The many flights over the past year and a half: ATL to MKE and MKE to ATL are distant memories.  Eight hundred plus miles no longer stand between us.  Now we can simply reach out and touch each other on a daily basis. 

J & C welcomed Briana, Bailey (my Maltese) and me with open arms.  Fez (her yorkie) is slowly warming up to my hyper Bailey; he’s no longer hiding under the bed from her so I think they’re making progress. What’s most comforting is seeing and feeling how prepared Nikki was for my arrival.  I have space in the closet, the drawers, the nightstand, the linen closet, the basement, the garage etc… Those are the physical aspects of her preparation which helped to get ‘my stuff’ settled in. We’ve turned her home into our home.

It is one thing to make space in the home.   What reassured me beyond words was the room she made in the following:

Heart- accepting me for me and loving me unconditionally. She emotionally caters to all of me.

Mind- understanding my likes/ dislikes, wants/ needs and desires while making them a priority.

Spirit- allowing me to coexist within her being on a higher level.  Trusting me with all of her…

She doesn’t allow her independence to hinder the dynamics of our togetherness.  Her selflessness, patience, and consideration are to be much-admired.  I’m not tooting any horns here but um…TOOT-TOOT to my babe for preparing for me beyond the physical.  Kudos to her for being attentive to my needs and meeting them, loving me a little more when I needed it most and being patient and understanding during this beautiful transition. Preparing beyond what can be seen is so appreciated!! 

Coming together under one roof isn’t just a physical preparation.  It is also a spiritual, emotional, and financial blending of individuals into a partnership.  It requires more than making room in the house.  You have to think, feel and be beyond yourself. It is necessary to be in tune with the happenings of your partner.  You have to ready yourself to love harder, understand deeper and coexist on a higher level together.

Tell us, how have you prepared?

©BJenkins, July 2011