God's Plan Wins

Often I make plans to do certain things that I want or need to do.  Planning gives me a snapshot of my happenings and allows me to account for my time and if needed, fit in other appointments.  I like to have an idea of what my day, week, and month will entail.  Family and friends who know me well always say “Brandy’s on top of it”.  Really, getting things done in a timely manner is very important to me.

The downside to planning is the unexpected occurrences which are beyond my control that seem to knock me off course.  It is during those times that I am reminded that God is in control and not I. What he has written will come to fruition despite any plans I might make for myself. 
There have been times when I thought I was doing things for my reasons when in reality God had the perfect plan in action.

Example:  When Briana graduated high school in 2011, I decided to move back to Milwaukee. I thought it was perfect timing because Nikki and I couldn’t stand to be apart any longer.  I landed a job before I arrived and the transition was seamless.  What was so perfect about this decision is I was able to be near my grandma and mom before their untimely passing. Again, my relocation was God’s plan and he provided for me in every way so that I could be with the love of my life and also spend precious moments with my family.

In our September blog Nikki posted the quote, “You must make a choice to take a chance or your life will never change.”  She eloquently told the story of our journey from Milwaukee to Los Angeles.  Well that was a month ago.  Since then, I completed my course and now have a 3 month break.  I planned to get my grind on and live this Cali life to the fullest! 

As God would have it, he showed me his plan once again.  On Tuesday, October 1^st; (2 days after the end of my class), Nikki was diagnosed with breast cancer.  As you can imagine, my heart was broken, I was angry, and I had so many other emotions brewing inside that my thinking was clouded.  I felt breathless… but soon I began to remember just how faithful God had been to us and surely he did not bring us this far to neither leave nor forsake us.  His many blessings entailed providing a job for me which enabled Nikki to work full-time from home. Allowed for us to be legally married.  We have two amazingly wonderful friends whom have adopted us as family and treated us nothing less than loved ones.  God’s timing is perfect…  I am fully available to support my sweet Nikki as our journey begins toward healing.  I am so grateful for life experiences.  Though I’d rather for this not to be happening, I am thankful for God’s mercy and his grace in every situation.  While my tears soak my pillow and my quietness stills my spirit, I believe with every ounce of life in me that my God will give me the strength to be exactly what Nikki needs me to be. He did not say it would be easy but he did say he will give us strength.

So as I go about my life planning for my tomorrows, humbly I understand God’s plan reigns supreme. 

  © BNasha October 2013

Choice-Chance-Change

Preface: Last weekend while I was in Atlanta, I was given a reminder-- a “gentle nudge” you might call it-- that our blog was way overdue for a posting. Thank you for the poke, we’re back on it~;-)

 “You must make a choice to take a chance or your life will never change.”

Since I was a teenager, I’ve been a collector of uplifting quotes as well as a devoted reader of inspirational books. The above quote was posted by a Facebook friend this past March and even though the adage wasn’t foreign to me, the words struck me in a manner they hadn’t before. 

For twenty years I worked in Corporate America, with 16 of those years at the same company. While I was grateful for my bi-monthly paycheck, medical benefits and growing pension, I was unfulfilled nearly nine hours of every day. Although I had managed to write 4.5 books while working full-time, I felt confined and restricted throughout my days, and limited to writing only in the evenings and weekends while still filling my role as a Mom and Partner. I was frustrated, angry and often sad that I didn’t have the freedom to explore my creativity on a full-time basis.

As spoiled and childish as it may sound, on occasion, maybe a few times a year I would cry before work or after work. That happened the day I read the above quote. Brandy, who had graciously listened to my whining day after day, decided we needed to put an end to my pouting and frustration. We had contemplated leaving Milwaukee for quite some time; those who know me were aware I had no desire to endure Midwest winters for much longer. Whenever we’d talk about moving, we got so excited about the new venture! But, within a day or two we’d determine the risk too great to leave our jobs, part from the children, and leave the security we had in Milwaukee.  

In mid-March (after that last crying episode) we spent a weekend in a Chicago hotel room and brainstormed our plan; we realized that if we didn’t act, and act quickly, we’d find yet another excuse to remain in Milwaukee, fearful of the unknown. That weekend we finalized our choice to take a chance because if we didn’t, our lives would never change.  While many people (including us) thought we’d relocate and settle in Atlanta, we opted for the west coast: California! On June 2^nd, two and half months after our decision, we hit the road to L.A.

I’d be lying if said the transition has been easy. In fact, on a couple of occasions we questioned if we made the right choice. We haven’t yet settled into our own place. At times we are frozen with sticker shock. I’ve been unable to figure out how to structure my days now that I work for myself all day, every day.  Brandy wants us to have everything we desire right now; unfortunately that’s not possible. 

These frustrations, however, are minimal. They’re trivial compared to the overwhelming blessings we’ve experienced. We’ve confirmed two amazing and beautiful friends in our lives. Brandy immediately secured a new job, which she started only three weeks after we arrived. We legally married on our anniversary in July. School began for Brandy on July 22^nd and she’s now 3 classes from graduation.  The EXchange, my fourth book was released at the end of June. I have a novella, Sugar on the Side (part of Carl Weber’s Full Figured series) set for release in October, and a contract to write another novella is on the way.  Above all, we have each other. Regardless of the city or household in which we live, at the end of every day we’re together, exactly where we’re meant to be.

We do not yet know if L.A. will become our permanent residence; time and experience will tell. With that said, I must add that we certainly have no intention to live a vagabond lifestyle. But, fortunately we now understand that we’re not bound to any job, city, or state. As long as we have each other and faith in the above, our lives are ours to live however and wherever we choose. J

©Nikki Rashan September 2013